Comedian, writer and actor, Brian Posehn.
I love stand-up comedy and Brian Posehn is probably one of my favorite comedians out there. Most geeks and nerds who are familiar with his brand of comedy know about his Star Wars obsession, but there was a bit back in the early 2000s (the video was taken down on YouTube) where Posehn said, “The fastest way to piss off a geek is to call their obsession by the wrong name.”
Naturally, I had to test this theory out and honest-to-God, there is nothing funnier than geek rage. If you’re kind of a dick, try some of these lines at the next con:
Screaming at Ringers in costume: “Harry Potter Sucks!”
Buffy Fans: “You know, I really liked the movie way better than the tv show.”
Star Woids: “Dude, how could you NOT like the Prequels?” or “Hey, Lucas’ vision was complete with the Special Editions and that’s how we should respect his art!”
Trekkies/Trekkers: “Chris Pine is a way better Captain Kirk than William Shatner ever was.”
Horror Fans: “Oh man, the scariest movie I’ve ever seen was Rocky Horror Picture Show.”
Magic Fans: “I don’t play that sh*t. Witchcraft is dangerous!”
Whovians: “The next guy needs to be American, maybe Canadian.”
X-Men Fans: “You know they are just a rip off of The Legion of Super Heroes.”
Old School Gamers: “You can’t beat Contra with two lives!”
Cosplayers: “Great costume! Where did you buy it?”
Mario/Luigi Cosplayers: “I LOVE Duck Dynasty.”
D&D Players: “WoW is better.” (say the inverse to WoWers)
Wiccans: “Dude, you guys are like the ORIGINAL LARPers!”
People claiming they used to be Wiccan: “So, how much weight did you lose?”
Evangelical Protestant Protesters: “You know, not all those Atheists are bad.”
Angry Atheists: “Relax, you know Christianity has some great moral lessons.”
Nightwing Fans: “Man, all they did was turn Dick Grayson in to a Peter Parker knock off.”
Batman Fans: “Batman was always intended to be campy.”
Superman Fans: “What was wrong with Superman Returns?
Discussing Marvel Movies: “I don’t care what you say, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance is the greatest Marvel movie since Elektra.”
Sam Raimi Fans: “Spider-Man 3 is my favorite movie!”
Super Hero Movies Conversations: “I can understand why they made Spawn PG-13.”
Be honest, how many of you turned purple just reading some of these? Guess what? These aren’t the meanest ones we came up with, this is the light list. What are some of your geek rage lines that you heard or pulled at cons?
